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Comparison is the thief of joy


What if instead of comparing ourselves to others, we use their success as a motivation for what we can become and achieve?

When I was younger, I used to compare myself to my siblings all the time (as I’m sure all of you did as well. It’s a very natural thing to do as kids and adults). It was very easy for me to compare because I felt different from them.

I would compare my looks, my personality, my gifts and talents etc. The crazy part was I didn’t even know I was comparing myself sometimes😀 I just did it. Even though I didn't understand completely what  comparison meant, I did understand the feelings that came with it very clearly. 

Whenever I would compare myself to my siblings it was always a negative response I’d get. I’d either feel bad about myself, my life or like I wasn’t good enough. Because of these negative emotions, I knew it probably wasn’t good so, I tried to push away the urge every time it came. Of course being a child it was easy to slip right back to comparing myself to my sisters because… while I was a child and that’s what we do. 

As I grew older I then understood correctly what comparison meant and how it was not good to do (especially while I was in my teens). It was very easy for me to slip and fall right back into that spiral of am I "good enough”. I realized that as I did compare myself to not just my sisters, but to the whole world that seemed to be against me, I felt the same way I did as a child: bad about myself, my life and like I was not "good enough". This was the same result every time I’d find myself comparing.

I really like this quote from one of the leaders in my church, he said: 


Can I just get an Amen! If you think about it, every time we choose to compare ourselves to other people who we think are doing better than us or who we think have the perfect life, the end results are always: misery, shame, dissatisfaction, disappointment, frustration, depression, loneliness, sadness, pride and so on. All that comes from comparison is feeling worse about who we are. 

It steals our joy and peace. It  poisons our souls and minds from feeling happiness. This makes our Father in Heaven sad.

But what if we could take that comparison and change it into something else? Change it to help us spiral upwards instead of downward…


Recently I’ve made a new friend who’s been inspiring me in so many ways. We have many of the same interests and likes, and it’s been neat to see how we’re able to grow by sharing ideas and helping one another. 

There have been moments where I’ve caught myself saying: ‘I wish I can be where he is now’, As I catch myself saying this I quickly try and change my thoughts- and that is when I realized what I was doing wrong. I was going about this the wrong way.

We can’t quit a habit like comparison overnight. It’s something that will always be in our life, but doesn’t have to be a part of our life. It’s something we can change if we really want to. It’s something we can switch around and use for the better. Now you’re probably wondering, how can I use comparison for the better- for my benefit? It is actually much simpler than you think. 

What if instead of using comparison to judge ourselves and others… We use it as a motivation- as a way to get ahead of where we are on our own journey. You catch what I’m saying? Stay with me because I’m just getting to the good part.

Let's say you are comparing your life to a friend who has an awesome car, a beautiful home, perfect kids, great body/health, amazing marriage and so on. Instead of comparing and complaining on how you don’t have all that, use your friends or whoever, as a motivation for what you want and CAN have. Make a plan, work hard and be kind and patient with yourself. Nothing is ever out of reach when motivation and self love are your prayers. You can do this! God believes in you, now you need to believe in yourself!

Isn’t this amazing! When I realized how easy it was to change my mindset it was neat to see how light I felt instead of burdened with comparison. You can do this too. Make up your mind today that you do not want to live a live of “I wish I had, but a life of I know I can have”

3 things I do when I feel like comparing:

🌸Try to breath.

🌸Think of my blessings and talents.

🌸Pray (vocally or in my heart) for guidance.

This is one of the best lessons I’ve learned and apply often. Everything I want, and I feel like is too far to reach, I’ve taken it as a challenge and motivation to work hard to get there. It may be a difficult long journey, but it will be worth all the sacrifices. 

Next time you feel like comparing yourself to your friends or whoever remember:


So go for it!

What are some things that motivate you to keep chasing what you want?:))

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